Your Standards in Life define you!

Its so true, isn’t it? It is not about raising or lowering your standards in life, but what you can adhere to. By sticking to your guns, it becomes you. Everyone might not have an instant liking towards you, but they can and will distinctly understand, eventually, that “this” is the person you are and that  “these” things surely cannot be applied to you. Then there always will be people who will pose as a challenge to you, by giving you a tough time, by coming in your way. By testing your limits. Now trust me, these types are actually with high sense of pride and big inflated egos, and who just cannot stand someone with their own bearing and self-worth. I hate to make this a yet another gender issue, but to a large extent it is. Men amongst men and women too in their own domains tend to back-off and swallow their vanities in midst of ones who stand by their line. But again, remarkable as it may seem, in many instances, people of the same gender might not appreciate on who maintains ethics.

Set your limits!

There comes a time when you have to draw a line. It can be about anything. Mostly, about major areas in life. It is the point till which you can comfortably stretch yourself. The moment you are trying to extend yourself for the sake of others – yes yes, its the ones you love – you can try several times, but slowly, you will start unsettling yourself and disliking the fact. Now, I am not talking about small, petty and irrelevant matters where you can handle things with a little bit of diplomacy or bending an iota, but about the larger chunks of behaviour and attitude you can accept and take.

Draw the line, stand your ground and do not waver. Otherwise, you can sway in any way the world wants you. There are such type of people too, surely, but these have an undermined sense of self-worth and no notable character. They’re happy to please important ones around them, as long as it suits their purpose. End of the day, it is what matters to you the most and how you can deal with it. And its all about accepting the other person the way he or she is, without greatly trying to change them for your selfish motives.

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My First Expert – My Mom

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Isn’t it but obvious that any child’s mother is his first teacher, parent, modifier, adapter and hence the first and a lifetime expert. For as long as one can recollect, a mother is the first human a child learns to instinctively react, respond and connect with. From a small scratch to an irrelevant fall, from a dislike in taste to a relishing aroma, from a demand to a request to pleading – in all there is the first thought of our mother. We intuitively know and surrender to her being our prime most need in our lives.

My mom has been my strength in all times. I see her as my pillar of support, both mentally as well as emotionally. She has been a spiritual ladder for me too. It is because of the values she has so carefully ingrained in me and nurtured me into the human being that I am today; that I am a strong, assertive and a clear-headed individual. For as long as I can remember, I have never seen her as a weak or an indecisive person.  She is a positive, strong, virtuous, and dutiful and an honest woman I have ever come across. Standing by her decisions, completing her duties in a timely fashion, attending to everyone’s needs and her own too are the true values I have inculcated. Being with her makes you see clarity and objectivity in all things around. Another thing I have learnt as an important takeaway is to be clearly responsible for your actions. She has also taught me to be a balanced and a proportionate girl.  Being my friend first, showing me to trust her, to being a strict parent – she has handled all roles with elan.

Teaching me to take care of myself along with the rest of the people in the house has been a great learning. This is because I see many other women who do not take care of themselves before others and either forget or put themselves in the last, ending in misery, suffering and not to mention, ill-health. And most of all, blaming others always for what occurs with you.

Discipline and punctuality are other crucial factors I have imbibed through her. These go a long way in making you socially and morally responsible. Again, a child first learns what he sees his parents do. If parents adapt a lazy and laid-back attitude, the children are bound to pick them up.

Another important lesson has been in giving your own self a lot of love and respect. This seems simple again but in reality, to get respected and valued and loved starts with gifting these attributes to oneself first and then expecting from others. And that too, not being dependant on others always. She always made me feel wanted and secure, loved and cared for in ways words cannot describe. It’s the loveliest feeling to be a treasured and a valued daughter.

Value of money and all material things; respecting another living being; gender equality; respect for food  – the list goes endless in the things I have learnt from her and am still learning. She is my soul companion, of that I am sure and I cannot do without her, ever.

Start A New Life – A Big Leap in Time

fish jump

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As I look back, it reminds me that moving ahead by taking a big step can become a huge and an impactful game changer. After completing my graduation, I took a year’s course in interior designing. And due to the changing times, Hyderabad was seeing a rapid development in the IT side, as more and more new and international corporate firms started establishing themselves in the BPO sectors. With this pace, it was that either I jump the bandwagon or pursue a course in MS in the US, both of which were seeming not possible with the family setup I was brought up in.

Coming from a modern in outlook, yet traditional in a thought-perspective kind of a background, these options seemed really unachievable. Yet, I was not going to pull up my knees and sit tight, waiting for marriage to happen soon. With my parents consent, I started giving interviews, till I learnt that most technical side of the job openings required a night shift. And as I was geared in that stream in my graduate studies, I did not want to undermine my capabilities by joining a non-technical call-center. Hopeful that all corporate companies will not demand so, I continued to scout and give interviews to suit my requirements of distance and working hours. But to my dismay, all the organizations I was interested in, had job openings in the night. This was logical as for the USA companies establishing in India, the time-difference was bound to be there.

Now, no one in the family had ever started working – as that would mean – Is the income level less so that the daughter has to work? Or – there was no ‘or’ actually. That was the first thought that any elder would have. The next hurdle would be – the “night-shift”. ‘However can you allow that? It’s a girl, for God-sake. And what about your reputation and prestige?”. These unspoken yet expected thoughts were streaming through my mind all along.

It was time to make up my mind – either be a run-of-the-mill kind of an eligible girl or join the crowd with elan and be proud of my achievements. So, I decided to stick to my guns and convince my parent that it was either going to be studying abroad or staying in the city, under their scanner and joining a prestigious global organization (I had already cleared an interview by then). They reluctantly agreed as pitched forth a lot of sensible talk that they have been so broad-minded and understanding so far and having achieved top rank in my graduation, it’s logical to start a flourishing career before I eventually get married.

The highlight of this true story is that, once I started working, in a few years, all my other cousins lavishly started working as if it was the natural transition. For one, I was greatly happy to inspire and positively influence all the cousins in my family by taking a big risk and starting a new life for myself and others in the process. This paved a wide path for many and options today are ever so varied and interesting. The momentum keeps going…

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A Child of all Ages…

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 children

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There is no truer fact that absolutely healthy and happy children make a wonderful home. It also goes the other way round, that children thrive on happiness around them, and hence the home’s ambience has to be lively and exuberant for the child’s to be so too. People are of all kinds. There are several we’ve seen who only look for external factors that can affect the child’s jubilation – healthy foods are on top of the list along with basic necessities such as clothes, toys, extra classes for additional skill sets etc. but is your child truly content and glad from deep within? As a child can only think so far – what can make him happy – a candy/toy/book?

You have to teach your child to learn to be happy with himself and his surroundings in a general setting of environment. Now that is not asking him/her to be tolerant of any or all forms of disapproving behaviors or immoralities, to learn to accept all that comes his way with a smile. No. In the general walk of daily routine normal life if he/she is more accepting then it will nurture him wonderfully – without the peaks and valleys, so to say. You as a parent have set the rules; show them the ground realities they can easily garner. These traits go a long way to establish a healthy and a beautiful being – a child of all ages, at all ages.

Why I am saying this is, if you’ll notice in today’s time, there is a general discontent in the air. Nobody seems genuinely satisfied or happy. Everyone relates their happiness quotient to a particular want – “If I had this, I would be much happier.” This thought pattern has also extended to the next generation – our prodigy. And again it goes both ways, we expect from our children, push them to learn a particular art, sport or musical instrument or say a language so as to boast or feel pride that we have an accomplished son or daughter and they expect us parents to get them physical things – a favorite toy maybe. This becomes an unending loop. It’s not that we should not expect from each other, but this relationship should be nurtured in a more loving, emotional and mental bonding. More than physical health what actually determines a healthy state is the State of the Mind. A hug, a peck on the cheek, relating before having to say – these are the characteristics which will always keep them happy for a lifetime. Impart meaningful values of compassion, kindness, joy, love, the gifts of giving and sharing to transform happy children to happy adults.

The Fascinating World of Movies!

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The world of movies is such a fascinating, interesting, inspiring, convincing, deceiving…oh the list is endless. Personally, its who you are which determines what kind of genre attracts you. Its such a vast kaleidoscope out there to pick from. and there are more and more thrilling ones added on almost each new day. Its as if a new bud is blooming – today- everyday. One goes, another gets added. From drama to action to comedy, romance, thrillers, adventure, fantasy, horror, war etc

Its a bit misleading to watch them unless you have an open and a mature mindset. But nonetheless, it keeps you occupied in the infinite possibilities and objectivities of happenings, surrealism, partiality – where you have to choose who’s right, story-lines, common mistakes made in the flow of narration. Also, noteworthy are the efforts put in by cinematographers, writers, director, music, graphics and so on. Another line-up of contributors to reckon. So much goes in the making of one motion picture. If the movie fails to achieve its target, its such a loss of so many joint endeavours. Feels like a thankless job, after so many inputs.

Another vein is to hook up to the audience. To create an entire package that will create a wow factor in nearly all aspects. Such are the wonders of the invention of cinema.

Watch out!

Happiness is a choice!

Staying and keeping yourself ‘Happy’ is a primary motive in today’s bleakly healthy survival. Its more of a choice than an option I would say. Because, it all depends upon you. You can whimper and whine hanging about in the room of your past or work yourself up for staying in the future by expecting and planning but the baseline should be feeling good and fulfilled. Be it your possessions, achievements or anything else – you take the plunge to be happy always, you will be, no matter what. Be with vibrant, bubbly, happy people, you are bound to take off some of their charm and habits and cultivate into your own style.

 

 

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What do we get by being happy?

Think for yourself, you’ll be much more:

  1. Alive
  2. Content
  3. Looking forward to the new
  4. Feeling good about yourself
  5. Spreading your charm and influencing people the right way.
  6. Carry an inner glow of satisfaction.
  7. Lead a balanced perspective
  8. Will not get agitated easily – develop self-control
  9. Less stress, more healthy

Gains are countless. After all, who likes to stay with a complaining, or a morose or a dull person. This also calls for a fact that you might have to associate with happier set of friends or associates and disconnecting with your old ones, But don’t worry there, once you step into this happy mode, your old set will either wear-off if they can’t stand you, or will transform into the newer joyful versions to join the crowd with you. 

Time to change!

 

 

 

DIY Lemon Hair Rinse

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Post the cleansing ritual, we generally use a conditioner to balance our hair and scalp’s ph ratio and to maintain in so for a day or two. Conditioner is also used for shine, silkiness, and boost and to form a protective layer for damage control.

Here’s the WHAT ALL:

  1. Juice of one Lemon (strained of course)
  2. ¾ cup of filtered water

Just mix the above tog. And rinse post shampooing. Leave it for a minute and rinse again with plain water. Use it preferably at room temperature for excellent results. Towel dry your hair.

The WHYs

  • Lemon makes your hair shiny, thick, strong and dandruff-free (who wants to have dandruff after all).
  • It’s a superb degreaser and hence useful for those who have oily hair/scalp.
  • Its fruity and tangy fragrance leaves hair scrubbed clean with a wonderful lingering scent.

Note: Lemon naturally lightens the colour of your hair over a period of time. Those who wish to avoid can check out The Vinegar Rinse or The Beer Bounce Rinse. (I will update these shortly.)